Sofa King We Tod Ed

I feel like I actually have a job now, this is a career this is something that is a possiblity and tangible...Responsibility does that I guess. Being held accountable. Doing work that actually means something to me and others.
Then... I am concerned about Tuesday. What is going to happen? What is our future? Is it really going to effect my everyday life? More War? More Crisis? There needs to be a revolution... and that I will get behind.

Sometimes music makes you cry, it touches you deep and no matter where you are if you hear it you will tear up..

Fall At Your Feet


Written By N. Finn

I'm really close tonight
And I feel like I'm moving inside her
Lying in the dark
I think that I'm beginning to know her
Let it go
I'll be there when you call

Whenever I fall at your feet
And you let your tears rain down on me
Whenever I touch your slow turning pain

You're hiding from me now
There's something in the way that you're talking
The words don't sound right
But I hear them all moving inside you
Go, I'll be waiting when you call

Whenever I fall at your feet
And you let your tears rain down on me
Whenever I touch your slow turning pain

The finger of blame has turned upon itself
And I'm more than willing to offer myself
Do you want my presence or need my help
Who knows where that might lead

I fall at your feet
And you let your tears rain down on me
Whenever I fall

the rain comes and washes over me...finally autumn is here!
I make so many changes.. always something better developing on the horizon, better opportunities.
We'll see. This time I am not that excited. I refuse to put myself into it because I always get let down.
I just need to do it and let everything else fall into place, because it will.

I have to go to work... my last week at this job and finally I am getting respect. You don't know what you got til its gone!
they have no clue as to my abilities, sometimes neither do I. It takes others to help me realise what a good chef and person I am. She says I have changed. Post-traumatic stress syndrome does that to a person. But I am starting to actually like this new person... if I could only learn to do what I need to do and quit worrying about the small shit!!!

Let it go.....

They say it's irrepairable, this damage. Oh well... I have to deal with it dont I?
Changing jobs... AGAIN. I think this is the one tho'.. finally. I laugh as I write that knowing full well I am so full of shit. I have been full of it for a long time and I think I am finally coming to the self realization that its not going to change anytime soon. I think we are all pretentious and egotistical.. so fucking wrapped up in our lives that we fail to see what is really happening. It is our generation. So, I get up every morning... have a cup of leftover coffee, smoke a cigarette and go take a shower. routine. I dont have any other things I do in order everyday.. well.. I light a smoke on the way to work at the same place everyday. And I listen to the same songs when I feel happy.. and shit.. it's the same everyday. Who am I kidding? Do we have to become creatures of habit? Or do we just subconsiously fall into it..because it's comfortable? Fuck comfortable... I don't want to just live... everyday the same... I want to LIVE!!! take my days off and have an adventure. so, for 5 days a week, I do the same shit, but boy! WATCH OUT! I am gonna cut loose come my days off....ooo boy! what a fucking joke. No, come my days off.. I will clean the house, do laundry and pay bills; have a dental appt and see my shrink...why? becasue that is what I do...and I have fallen into what we all eventually do... predictablity. Didn't used to be like that... see what happens when you grow up?